On being unqualified and pivoting: A final summer update

Transcript

[00:00:00] Hey friends. Welcome to the final episode of My Summer Behind the Scenes series. If you're not familiar, I have taken the last, well, this is episode number eight, so the last eight episodes to just kinda wing it instead of planning ahead and doing all my research and pre-writing the script and all of that stuff. And it's been a really good experiment for me.

[00:00:23] I actually wonder if it would be worth doing this in between my regular content based episodes. Maybe alternating the days like... Anyway, I'm just considering that because this has been really good for me. Just the idea of creating this content with the intent of having you hear about what I'm working on and not holding myself to the standards that I usually have for my content that I put out each week.

[00:00:51] But I am considering that, and I think that after a few weeks I'll know what my answer is. I think it would be really cool, but I also don't want to overload myself. But then at the same time, it's kind of the same thing, right? Because if I go back to my old format, which is content based, SEO optimized types of content and episodes on this podcast, then it...

[00:01:15] it's kind of the same, right? It's still every other week with that, but then I'm filling in the blank weeks with me checking in. I dunno, I feel like it shouldn't be that hard, but since it's me doing all the stuff and wearing all the hats back here, then it's kind of like I need to have a talk with my supervisor, which is me before I make any decisions like that.

[00:01:38] But, we'll, we'll see how it goes.

[00:01:40] Today for the final episode of Summer Behind the Scenes, I'd like to share with you what I'm up to on a personal level because I do have my own personal projects that I'm doing that are technically not business related, although I don't think I can ever not think about business and making things part of my career path.

[00:02:00] But I would like to share with you what I've been working on and what I'm learning, and then after that, that would, that shouldn't take too long. It's just a couple of things. But after that, I'm gonna tell you what my plans are for the time, the brief hiatus that I'm gonna be on after this episode airs.

[00:02:21] So I think in my previous episode I had said that I wanted to take two weeks off and just like regroup and give myself time to breathe and then come back with the regular content again, and I decided to go ahead and double that for myself.

[00:02:38] Not for any particular reason. Other than that I know that I probably need more rest than I'm giving myself, just based on previous patterns and knowing myself, I probably need double what I'm.

[00:02:51] Allowing myself to take off. So I'm gonna take off four weeks, and that means that we'll be back with the next episode near the end of August.

[00:03:01] And I'm gonna be plenty busy. One of the things that I'm doing personally is I'm taking a children's illustration course. It's via the extension offerings from UC San Diego, and it's one of those things that as a personal project, I just, I have a lot of interest in it because I have an idea for a children's book that I would like to make.

[00:03:24] And especially now that my workbook is finished and I've kind of taken myself through the process of creating something physical. I'm really interested in it and I just wanna see if I can do it and how it turns out.

[00:03:37] But I felt like I wanted some formal education, so I went ahead and signed up for it.

[00:03:43] It's expensive. It is not cheap. It was like 400 bucks, 425, I think. And it's several weeks this summer.

[00:03:51] It's actually a lot of work. Like I thought that it would just be the your regular course. Where they'd give you information and then you have reflection questions, and then maybe they have like exercises that you can do, but ooh! This, this is a college course.

[00:04:08] Maybe an easy one.

[00:04:09] Because I'm not trying to pretend that this is at the level of what kids in college are dealing with right now, but it's, it's quite a lot.

[00:04:18] It has me going to the library and borrowing several books after researching, so there's researching certain kinds of children's books, borrowing them, writing them up, engaging with my classmates, doing critiques, doing drawings, but trying to keep it as simple as possible.

[00:04:36] Which is actually pretty difficult for me since you might have noticed from my branding that I like things that are busy and full of details and full of lots of fun things.

[00:04:47] So I'm taking it pass no pass instead of for a grade. I don't know if I actually want to go through with all of the classes after this and go for a formal certificate or if I'm just gonna maybe take the next one and then kind of do things on my own from there.

[00:05:04] Cause I think that I could probably self-publish my own children's book since I have some experience with that just, you know, past experience.

[00:05:14] But it's been really good for me and it's also been a good practice in not expecting too much of myself. So I'm not trying to get an A, I'm just trying to do the bare minimum to pass, but then I also am trying to pass it, right?

[00:05:31] That, what I mean is that I signed up for pass no pass versus non-credit because I didn't want myself to quit. Or say, you know what, nevermind I'm really busy and just like go on my merry way as the busy adult that I am.

[00:05:49] So I'm trying to stay on top of it. And it's been fun. It really has. It's a little confusing, like I think that my preferred communication style doesn't quite match up with this instructor's method of teaching and how, you know, they, how they run the class. But it's, overall, it's been good for me and now that I know from the first two weeks of it, how busy it is and how much work, I know not to leave it to the last couple of days before deadlines, before I start working on the assignments.

[00:06:23] Like I, I know that I need to spread it out fully over the entire week that we're given to get those assignments done.

[00:06:29] And then the other thing for my own personal development is that I'm getting back into weightlifting. I don't have super fancy weightlifting equipment. Like I took a weightlifting class in college, and so I'm familiar with like the, the Olympic barbells and the, the standard exercises that, you know, most people are do for weightlifting. But I do have my at home stuff and I have my own like standard barbell and lots of weight plates. And so now I'm just trying, trying it out and seeing how I feel about it.

[00:07:03] I really like how it makes me feel afterward, like there's something about doing a weightlifting session versus like a cardio session or a or a high intensity interval training kind of session. There's just something about weightlifting and lifting heavy that makes me feel super, like, pretty powerful afterward. I mean, like, don't get me wrong, I, I like, I, I like all kinds of exercise, well, most kinds of exercise, but this one's been good for me.

[00:07:34] I borrowed some books from the library on ideas for weightlifting. And I also, by the way, I used to be a group fitness instructor. I got certifications and all that stuff, and so I actually know quite a bit about different exercises and muscle groups and stuff like that.

[00:07:48] I never went all the way and did personal training certification. That's probably one of my projects, my life projects that I signed up to do and I never did it. So I have the books and the education and the information that I need to make up my own workouts, and that's been kind of fun.

[00:08:11] So I'm gonna keep doing that and see where it goes.

[00:08:14] I actually had the reason for the, the gap, I mean, like you probably didn't notice, but there was a gap between the last episode and this one was because I had like a family thing come up and it really, it kind of tossed my nervous system all over the place.

[00:08:34] And I got really, I don't know, it was just not a, not a great week for me. So that's why I didn't end up doing this episode last week. But I will say that, Being physical and working out has helped a lot just because you know, you have things to think about. So physical exercise, thinking about muscle groups and moving safely and warming up and cooling down and like really paying attention to my body and then that plus doing more art by myself.

[00:09:05] So I've really gotten into watercoloring. I like to do abstract stuff. And I'm trying to fo follow some like watercolor exercises that are more mindfulness based, which has been really good for me. It turns out that I, I have been avoiding... well, not really. Part of my challenge with art has been that I've been expecting too much of myself. And so I think giving myself permission to do abstract stuff and not le not caring about what it looks like has been really good.

[00:09:40] So overall, I'd say that I'm having a lot of fun. I'd say that I have plenty to keep me busy.

[00:09:47] Obviously I'm still taking care of my brother. I've actually got a trip where we're going traveling later on after my solo trip next week actually.

[00:09:59] So, moving on to the plan and when I have planned for myself. Next week I'm gonna be going on a solo trip.

[00:10:06] I really like going on local driving, sort of, you know, semi-local. Anything that I can get to via a car just to get away. So I'm going somewhere next week just by myself to, to take a break and I'll probably bring my art supplies and I got a few days in a hotel and I won't say where I am for safety reasons, but yeah, I'm looking forward to that, just to kinda get away for a little while.

[00:10:33] You know, I always wonder about people who are like influencers or do social media for a living and how they have to, they're always, I mean, social media is really something in itself.

[00:10:43] But the way that people are bound to their phones, especially people who make a living off of it or they're trying to. And they're going traveling and spending money to be in certain locations, but then they're also broadcasting it to the world.

[00:10:59] And I don't know. I think that there's probably some level of safety that you have to have with yourself and the place that you, you're in for you to do that.

[00:11:08] And I definitely don't have that. Like occasionally. I know in previous trips that I took like to Disneyland by myself, I know that there's no way to really avoid people if you share anything about being at Disneyland, because obviously if you're in the park then everyone you know kind of knows where you are.

[00:11:28] But I. My little workaround for that was whenever I posted something on Instagram, just to say where I am and what I'm doing, cuz that's the, the part of Instagram that I actually enjoy doing.

[00:11:40] I tend to wait until I'm out of that location before I post it, just so that I don't know. If, if someone's like watching my stories or whatever, I don't want them to like spy on me. I don't know. I, they can spy on me at any time. But yeah, it's just weird. I'm a little weird with that, with solo travel and, and making known where my, where I'm located at the moment.

[00:12:01] But I'm gonna take that little break next week just to regroup and relax.

[00:12:08] And then the next thing is my batching membership that I'm putting together. Now, this smart part is a little tricky for me because the original intention for the batching membership was that I wanted to do something about how it's hard to make friends with other entrepreneurs because most of the time, if you look for small businesses or you do a Google search or you do like looking for me, you know, on meetups or Eventbrite kinds of things.

[00:12:38] My experience has been that you always end up with people who are like restaurant owners or in the trades, like plumbers and mechanical kinds of work.

[00:12:53] And not that I don't wanna meet those kinds of people, but like my people are more of the. Mental health, mental awareness, life coaching, transformational services, types of people.

[00:13:05] And I'm like, I don't, I don't understand this. Like how come I can only find these kinds of people online? And I, you never know who around you is actually doing this in a virtual way because we we're kind of invisible, right?

[00:13:21] We're virtual and we don't need an office. And it's just one of those things where I'm like, these are the kind of people that I wanna be with because I just wanna have like deeper conversations and stuff like that.

[00:13:32] Not that people who aren't entrepreneurs can't have deep conversations, but. There's just something about talking with someone else who is a business owner or a service provider, and just having that connection and knowing what it actually is like.

[00:13:47] Versus my experience with speaking with people who are in more, more of a corporate day job type of setting. They tend to get kind of wistful and and dreamy eyed about having a business, and that's fine, except that it kind of blocks me off.

[00:14:06] Cause I'm like, well, I don't wanna pop their, their dream bubble, you know? And, and I don't wanna be like a downer about it, but, you know, this is, this is a hard career path. So the idea with the batching membership was that I was hoping that I could bring people together under, kind of sounds deceptive, but under the guise of getting together to batch out some stuff.

[00:14:31] And I think that that's still, that's still relevant, but I also wanted to bake in some kind of like, friend, friend matchmaking. Like, meet your, meet other entrepreneurs and we'll also work on batching things together.

[00:14:49] And I don't know, I had that in my mind for a couple of, well, not more than a couple months, and I just never... really sunk in.

[00:15:10] And I think the reason for that is that I'm actually not qualified to do that. And I think once I... Once I accepted that, then I was like, oh, this can actually be a lot simpler. And maybe I can, you know, in keeping with the theme of this podcast, maybe I can give myself a little more grace and not expect as much as I'm expecting of myself.

[00:15:33] And so I really had to just kind of come to terms with how I am not a super connector type person. I'm more of the person who can give ideas and feedback and really dive in and figure out how to make things happen.

[00:15:50] But I'm not really a people person, and this has nothing to do with like shyness or an anxiety or introversion or anything like that.

[00:15:59] It's just the, the way that I am and what I'm personally... what I personally find very easy and natural to do.

[00:16:07] And so I'm kind of reworking it less about the friendship part and more about the benefits of batching and what I bring to the table instead of putting pressure on the people who come.

[00:16:23] Not that there was like a lot of pressure. See, I'm already overthinking it.

[00:16:26] But I have reached that conclusion that I'm not gonna make it about like connecting and, and friendship, although that will happen naturally. Just because that's how things are when you bring people together under one unifying reason to get together.

[00:16:41] But I don't know. I'll figure it out.

[00:16:43] But I, I really was feeling unqualified for the original intent. So I'm pivoting and I, the pivot feels a lot better than what I was doing in the past to get myself to accept the idea of doing something that I just apparently didn't even wanna do.

[00:16:59] I am struggling a little bit over the value of it because, you know, I'm doing the usual stuff where I write out the sales page, write out the benefits, write it out so that it's like, you know, it really speaks to the inner struggles that my ideal member would be going through while I, while reading the sales page.

[00:17:19] And another argument that I'm having with myself is that I. I'm arguing over the value of it, like financial value. I know that most.

[00:17:33] I mean, like, I know that it's gonna be high value, but like what is the actual price tag that you put on it? I know how much it needs to cost for it to be worthwhile for me to, to reach my, my own business goal with it.

[00:17:50] But at the moment, the number that I have in mind as a monthly fee is too much. And I don't know exactly why I feel that way, but I feel like it's too much. And so, you know, of course I'm, I'm doing the, the internal dialogue of like, what can I add to it? What can I, how can I make him more valuable? Even though I know that like, you know, some, some white dude out there is probably doing something for like three times this amount and probably not at the caliber or quality that I'm gonna be doing it.

[00:18:21] So it's, it's one of those things where I'm like, okay, be, be the, the representation that someone needs to see in this space. Ask for your worth, charge your worth and add tax. Like, I'm, I'm grabbing all of the, the cliche but necessary phrases and encouragement that I can remember and just being like, okay, this is, this is really what it costs.

[00:18:49] And I don't know, but I'll figure that part out. I, I really am glad that I decided that it's gonna be a rolling membership, meaning that people can sign up anytime that they want. And there's, I don't have to worry about like a launch schedule. Because honestly after, after working on.

[00:19:10] Well, my illustration course, you know, having assignments and having to finish them, that's a big thing that I'm, that's taking part of my brain.

[00:19:18] And then also the workbook, which by the way, came in and it is ready to, it, it's all set up and it's evergreen.

[00:19:25] And if you can't see the video, like if you're li you're watching this, I'm holding it up and I got it printed. It has a nice, glossy, colorful cover. And it's spiral bound, and the inside is, is color.

[00:19:41] But it was just really fun for me to get this printed. I used the, the service, Lulu, l u l u. And ordered my own, ordered a copy of my own or workbook. And I can already tell just because this is how my brain works, but I can already tell which, what kinds of things I wanna change.

[00:20:02] And I know that I had chosen the wrong kind of paper because this is like, I chose like the premium color paper, but then that made it semi glossy in my opinion, and it's a workbook that I want people to write in.

[00:20:15] And so now I'm like, well, you know, technically if someone got this exact copy, then their writing with smudge, you know? So things like that are on my mind, but it's still really nice to have a physical copy of my own.

[00:20:30] And it's, it's a digital product. Like I'm not selling physical copies so people can, people can print it out, however, with whatever supplies they have.

[00:20:39] But yeah, so that's, that's actually really nice to have something finished and done. And the project is over. Like, You know, high five team, which is me, and being able to like move on to the next thing.

[00:20:55] And so I mentioned that because with the membership, I'm, I really need something... I'm, I'm kind of tired of aiming for a finish line.

[00:21:08] I obviously, I'm gonna have like certain milestones that I wanna get into, but I... I kind of like that it's gonna be an evergreen-- no, it's a rolling basis, not launch based.

[00:21:21] So I don't have to worry about like closed carts and onboarding and, you know, onboarding cohorts or anything like that, although that might happen later down the line.

[00:21:30] I dunno. We'll see how it goes, but like, it's kind of nice to have an ongoing project that's basically never done or finished, but is still currently fabulous, no matter when people buy into it. \

[00:21:47] So that's my update for today. I am looking forward to getting to work on the next things, and I am gonna miss this.

[00:21:56] I'm, but I am gonna be relieved. To not have to show up and give you an update on things that I'm doing for at least four weeks.

[00:22:05] We'll see if I end up, you know, giving more behind the scenes kinds of episodes. I know that in typical podcast best practices, they say that like weekly is better than biweekly.

[00:22:20] But I'm one person, man. And, and I don't know if I can produce much more than I already am.

[00:22:27] So I hope that your projects are going well. I hope that you are surrounding yourself with lots of people who are supportive and encouraging and remind you that you are doing a great job and doing real work with your business.

[00:22:44] And yeah, reach out if you need my support, I have the option of a pick my brain call so we can just sit down for 30 minutes if you wanna just talk it out with me and see what kinds of things you might wanna focus on for the next few months.

[00:23:00] And aside from that, you can also join my batching membership whenever it is posted.

[00:23:07] But you'll see that pretty soon cuz that's not one of those like, pie in the sky someday, things the, this is a no, it's, it's gonna be ready by the time you hear my voice next. In the the next episode.

[00:23:20] So wish me luck and I wish you a lot of luck and success and I will see you next time.