Mastering Mindfulness to Overcome Self-Doubt as a Solopreneur

September 28, 2023

Rochelle is a filipino woman talking into a microphone. Text says the “Someone already did your business idea" there are flowers and rhinestones sprinkled around the edges like a digital collage

Description and Show Notes

So you're in the early stages of launching your business, doing your research, and crafting your business plan. It's common to find a competitor who seems to have already mastered what you're planning to do, and you can't help but feel overwhelmed and disheartened. Maybe you begin to doubt whether pursuing your business idea is even worth it, now, since it's already been done.

In this episode, Rochelle covers practical strategies that will empower you to embrace your uniqueness, manage stress effectively, and find the confidence to pursue your business journey with renewed purpose. Learn to navigate competition while staying true to your vision.

Links to references in podcast:

  1. Palouse Mindfulness

  2. Insight Timer

  3. The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook

Takeaways:

  1. Embrace Your Uniqueness: Understand that in a competitive market, it's natural to encounter others doing what you're passionate about. But remember, your perspective, your story, and your approach are uniquely yours. This episode shows you how to harness the power of your individuality to stand out.

  2. Tame Self-Doubt with Self-Compassion: If self-doubt and isolation are holding you back, learn how to practice self-compassion. Recognize that it's okay to seek support from mentors, therapists, or like-minded entrepreneurs. The journey doesn't have to be lonely, and self-compassion can change things for the better.

  3. Mindfulness for Stress Management: Consider the art of mindfulness to manage the relentless stress of entrepreneurship. This episode introduces you to practical mindfulness techniques that will help you stay centered, focused, and resilient in the face of business challenges.

  4. Listen to Your Inner Wisdom: Remember to tune into your inner wisdom. Trust yourself to make decisions aligned with your vision and values. Actively work on overcoming perfectionism and realize that progress is the key (stop trying to be perfect at not being perfect!). Your business journey is a reflection of your unique path, and you are doing good work. Trust in yourself!

TRANSCRIPT (CLICK TO EXPAND)

This is Compassionate Side Hustle Strategy, hosted by me, Rochelle Sanchez. I help solopreneurs like you build good habits and compassionate systems that allow you to show up consistently and authentically in your business.

The end goal is to help you onboard a virtual assistant who is 100% aligned with your mission and within your budget, but there are a few things you should probably get in place first, right? That's why we're here.

You deserve to do what you love for a living. And I believe that you're closer than you think. So clear your schedule and let's get to work on the next best step for you on your business journey.

Hello friends. It's Rochelle here. And we're continuing with our study of basically how to apply compassion within your own business and to yourself as a business owner.

So if this is your first episode with me, just keep in mind that we started off with these definitions in the previous episode. And so the previous episode of this podcast is all about being kind to yourself. And I think that that's a really good place to start because kindness is what we tend to think of when we think of the word compassion, but I am actually using the definition for self-compassion coined by Dr. Kristin Neff.

And if you're on the audio version, you can't see this, but I'm holding up the book and it's called self-compassion: the proven power of being kind to yourself.

And, you know, in my opinion, being kind to yourself as a business owner, also being kind to your business too, because you can, it's really easy to hold your business to a higher standard than maybe you're capable of you know, creating right now. Especially with you whatever resources you have, whatever time you have. And so just keeping that in mind and trying to be mindful of. What you have and what you're doing.

And so today today, we're actually talking about mindfulness because that's the second component of her definition. The first one component was kindness. The second one is. Mindfulness. And

I'm going to read from it here. She says mindfulness refers to the clear seeing and nonjudgmental acceptance of what's occurring in the present moment facing up to reality in other words.

And this part I think is so important because basically without mindfulness, you ended up slipping into the very like colonizer type of definition of self-compassion. Or just being compassionate to others, which is just being nice. And defaulting to that sort of love and light mode, which doesn't help anyone.

And probably, especially the people who, who use it right? So mindfulness as a concept applied to your yourself as a business owner and to your business and the work that you're doing.

So for yourself as a business owner. I like to refer back to this this thing that she refers to, which is suffering equals pain times resistance. And she talks about in this book that she met- she had a teacher on a meditation retreat.

And he said the key to happiness was understanding that suffering is caused by resisting pain. Now, unless you're doing something kind of radical or maybe not so great in your business, you probably not in physical pain because of it, right? I hope that you're not forcing your body to do things that it can't do.

Or that you're not like twisting your own mental health around and causing yourself any kind of pain and suffering on purpose or maybe not so on purpose to get those sales.

Because, yeah, having a business means that you're trying to make sales and you're trying to generate money for yourself so that you can use it. You know, for yourself for taking care of your loved ones, for giving back to the communities that you care about.

But while you probably aren't causing yourself any physical pain. I mean, I suppose if you're moving lots of product and you're doing all the manual labor yourself, then like you probably are.

But there are other kinds of pain. Right. There's like emotional pain. There's holding yourself to a certain level or a certain standard that you literally cannot handle right now.

And so like be emotional and I mean, not to get all like meme about it, but like the emotional damage. That you are creating for yourself. That's pain too.

And then also, if you think about it, You're probably in a lot of pain in how you are just like bummed out. You're really disappointed. Maybe you're really lonely. Maybe you're suffering because you just don't have the kind of support that you wish that you had at this point.

And so like all of those things, those levels of suffering. That's where mindfulness comes into play, because I think that if you're not, if you're suffering a lot, then it's going to be really hard to relay your message and really work on your mission and get your, get your work out there if you yourself are suffering in the process.

So let's use a very service level example of suffering and just to kind of dive into this idea of mindfulness and how to apply it to your business.

Maybe you're at the beginning of like the early stages of running your business. And while you're doing your research on it, you're putting together your business plan and your marketing plan. And then you see you know, of course, because this is just how ads and retargeting and search engines work. While you're researching you find out that someone else is doing this at like 50 times the scale that you, you actually want to do. And you find that they're doing an excellent job of it already. They seem to be very successful. And you're wondering like how in the world you're even going to tap into that market because someone else is already at like the top, top, top.

And so that can actually cause a little bit of suffering within you, right? You can be like, oh man. You know, I, I had this great idea. I still want to do it. But someone else is already doing it. And so what's the point? Because I want to, you know, this is where you start to think, well, I can probably like protect myself by not doing it. I can decrease my risk by not doing it. I can save my money for maybe an idea in the future and not do it.

And it's like, all of those are true. But if you really feel called to do this thing, Then knowing that someone else is doing it out there, isn't going to really help you, right? And you're just basically sitting here. Suffering.

And the concept of mindfulness comes into play here. When you realize that nothing has happened. Right? You may have been doing your research. You may have been like looking at the screens and maybe you have like a whole Excel sheet of like examples and numbers that you've crunched, or maybe you have you know, a Google doc that is filled with all of your, like, you know, your SWOT analysis. And you're really, you really dove into it. But now you're kind of like curdled up. I feel like it's a little bit of like, feeling like you have a scribble inside of your chest where you're like, oh no, I don't feel clear. I don't feel particularly stable. And I kind of want to quit and this really sucks.

Well, if you keep in mind, what mindfulness is, it means seeing things for what they are right now and what they are right now is you are still a physical person with a dream. With a wish. Of this project that you want to do. This business that you want to build, that's still a viable business. And by the way, It's been obviously, you know, tested out and proven to be a really good idea by this other person.

But you are just one human doing research. Reading words. And managing your own energy levels, even if you aren't blatantly doing that. And so if you sit there and you take away all of the things take away, the spreadsheet take away the, you know, the the business plan, the marketing plan, all of the Google things that are coming up now in your, in your sidebar ads telling you what you need to start a business.

If you like take all of that away and you just kind of sit with yourself. You yourself, within your own human body. And say, I still want to do this. I still want this for myself. I still believe that I can. Bring this to my community in a way that's completely unique and probably what they need from the person that they need it from right now.

That's what the mindfulness is when you let go of all of the big stormy. You know, hurricane would feel feelings and basically over generalizations is what you're looking at here.

Because you're overgeneralizing that just because one person or one company has already done what you thought of that you shouldn't do it. That's basically what business is. Like, it's everybody regurgitating the same ideas. In their own way. And so that totally means that you are set to go. You're all right. You can keep doing this, but in the moment, You need to acknowledge these feelings. Acknowledge that it's a whole lot of information out there and that you're just one person maybe.

Maybe you don't have the foundational support that other people have. Maybe you don't, you didn't grow up in a family where your parents were entrepreneurs so that you didn't really have someone to. Set that tone for you, or maybe you even have. You know, the image of a parent being an entrepreneur, but it meaning that like life was pretty miserable. And so you kind of have that modeled for yourself.

So mindfulness means coming back to yourself. Just acknowledging that you are sitting here with this green idea and you have a big heart and you really want it to work. And you can make it work as long as you don't let all of these like external elements get in your way.

You have to be really mindful of the generalizations that you're making, about what you learn. What input you get from other people. Because of course, you've probably told some people about your idea and they were more or not so much supportive or maybe they had too many opinions, even though they weren't going to be the ones implementing the idea themselves. And so just like bringing it all down to what is actually happening it's you in your own body. In your own mind thinking of this project.

And then when we circle back to that idea, that suffering is basically pain times resistance. You can understand what you're actually up against because the actual pain that you have is that maybe you're feeling lonely.

Or maybe you're feeling isolated or maybe you're feeling really behind and not supported. And that's the actual pain that you can use within that formula where you can say, well, you know, how resistant am I to this problem that's in front of me?

Not the gigantic worldwide problem of everyone having it all together before you did.

Or, you know, the, the idea that you're up against this giant corporation that has like so much funding and you're just one person. Like you can get to that maybe if ever later on. Maybe not. But you can deal with your own pain. What is the actual pain that you're feeling? What feelings or emotions within you are coming up because you found out that someone else has done this.

Or because you got feedback from your friend or your loved one saying, oh, this is going to be hard. Oh, this is going to take a lot of money and you know that you don't have the money right now. Just understanding that.

You feel pressure, maybe you feel fear because you're like, I don't know how to do this. Or maybe you feel disappointed that you don't have the kind of support that you were expecting.

And so dealing with those kinds of feelings in your own way, whether it's talking to your therapist or talking to a trusted mentor. Or even just journaling it out. Acknowledging it that way. That's the mindfulness that I'm talking about here.

And not making all of like the bigness be the reason that you make your decisions. Make the decisions based on what you want to do. And then also keep in mind what you need right now.

And if anything, start Googling that! Because sometimes it's hard to tell what you actually need.

I don't know how many times I have used Google in a way that I think is a little more helpful than, you know, looking for a marketing plan or what's the best way to expand my network or grow my email list.

Sometimes the more useful Google search is how do I start feeling less lonely?

Or where can I find other entrepreneurs to support me on my journey?

Or what are some easy ways to relieve stress?

If you're interested in learning a little bit more about mindfulness, I have a resource and like to be honest, a lot of the stuff it was given to me by my therapist.

I'm not a therapist, but I did find the resources helpful. But there is a free online course called mindfulness based stress reduction.

It's by the guy that created the method of MBSR. And so it's not necessarily directly related to being an entrepreneur and managing stress, the kind of stress that you might be under right now.

But it is a good way to kind of practice and get to know yourself, get to know your own body and what it feels like to just like slow down.

And just be aware of things, be mindful of things. And it's a free course. You can just look up mindfulness-based stress reduction by Palouse Mindfulness. P A L O U S E. And I'll link to it in the show notes.

But yeah, it's a, it's a good way to get like an introduction to the idea of just being mindful. Especially if you're like me and you're a little bit of an overachiever. Maybe you went to public school where the whole, the whole idea was to get like good grades your entire life. That's kind of an issue that I had.

And then once you get out into the world, then you find out, oh, the grades didn't really mean that much. And so what do I do with my body now?

So the, this idea of mindfulness and coming back to myself really helped me slow down and figure out what matters more to me than being impressive or being and being one of those or achieving something that seems like newsworthy, if that makes sense. So check that out.

And if not, then you can also, you know, just look for anything mindfulness based, whether it's in the insight timer, the meditation app.

Or actually I have one more thing I can share with you. And again, if you're listening to the audio, I'm holding up a workbook and it's called the mindful self-compassion workbook. This is... oh, the subtitle is a proven way to accept yourself, build inner strength and thrive.

And this is a really good resource for me and the ways that I get overwhelmed as an, as a business owner. And just like for my life in general, at this phase of life that I'm in. And it's very good. I haven't finished it yet because it's just one of those things where like you work through it and you're like, oh, this is so good that I have to stop. And kind of process it a little bit and then get back to it again. But I recommend it. If this sounds like something related to what you might be struggling with within your own body and within your own business.

All right, that's it for today. And you know, if you want to share your journey with me, feel free to email me any time. Use the contact form on my website, at rochelle sanchez dot com. If there are things in your practice of being more compassionate as a business owner that you wanted to like share with me, or maybe there's some things that are kind of stumping you, and you're wondering how that plays into it and how you can slow down and be a little bit more mindful as the business owner that you've always wanted to be. Send me a message. Alright? Okay. I will see you next time.

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