Transformative Goal Setting for Sensitive Souls (Alternatives to traditional goal setting)

December 7, 2023

Image with the title of the episode and a photo of Rochelle, a filipino woman with her black hair tied back and thick rimmed glasses, smirking with her head tilted. The background is lime green and there are flowers and rhinestones sprinkled around the edges like a digital collage

Description and Show Notes

Sensitives! Empaths! It's time to embrace your unique superpower! In this episode, Rochelle explores the challenges faced by those who feel overwhelmed by the demands of hustle culture and provides a refreshing perspective on goal setting for empathic entrepreneurs. An intro to alternative goal-setting methods that foster success without compromising well-being.

Key Takeaways:

  1. Acknowledge Your Superpower: Rochelle highlights the importance of recognizing sensitivity and empathy as powerful tools in entrepreneurship, encouraging listeners to view their emotional depth as a valuable asset rather than a hindrance.
  2. Ditching the Burnout Cycle: Listeners struggling with burnout are guided through alternative goal-setting practices, shifting the focus from achievement-based goals to tracking time spent on tasks and cultivating desired feelings, offering a pathway to sustainable success.
  3. Embrace Emotional Intelligence: Rochelle introduces a scale of one to ten for tracking current and desired feelings, empowering listeners to proactively cultivate positive emotions and find inspiration within, rather than relying solely on external achievements.
  4. Actionable Steps Over Outcomes: The episode emphasizes the importance of setting goals based on actionable steps within one's control, promoting a healthier approach to success by celebrating the journey and achievements along the way, rather than fixating on end results.
  5. Join the Empathic Entrepreneur Movement: Rochelle concludes by urging listeners to connect on LinkedIn and share their experiences, fostering a community of empathic entrepreneurs who can collaborate, support one another, and collectively reshape the narrative surrounding success in the business world.

Connect with Rochelle on LinkedIn, share your experiences, and be part of a supportive community redefining success in the business world. Subscribe now for more insightful episodes and take the first step toward a balanced and fulfilling approach to entrepreneurship. Remember, your superpower is your strength.

TRANSCRIPT (CLICK TO EXPAND)

This is Compassionate Side Hustle Strategy, hosted by me, Rochelle Sanchez. I help solopreneurs like you build good habits and compassionate systems that allow you to show up consistently and authentically in your business.

The end goal is to help you onboard a virtual assistant who is 100% aligned with your mission and within your budget, but there are a few things you should probably get in place first, right? That's why we're here.

You deserve to do what you love for a living. And I believe that you're closer than you think. So clear your schedule and let's get to work on the next best step for you on your business journey. 

I don't know about you, but there are certain times of year certain times of month when I am, especially in my feelings. And this time of year is actually one of those times when I start to hang back and think about why I'm doing what I'm doing.

And also what I like about it, what I don't like about it. And what it really means to me. Because I feel like there are certain times during certain cycles of your life where you're more open to those that kind of interpretation of how you're living your life.

And unfortunately in the entrepreneurial world we are totally familiar with the idea of being productive and for hustling. I mean, like it's literally in the title of this podcast, right?

But I think that we do have to be consciously aware of how far we're taking it. Because otherwise why are you building the business that you're building? If you're just repeating the mistakes or the, the problematic systems that are being used in your day job that you dislike a whole lot. Or within your school system where your kids go to school or within the us government. Where we realized that like, you know, the decision making process doesn't actually work in a way that is actually helpful for a lot of people.

And so of course we can't carry the problems of entire countries on our shoulders, but I think that we can start simple and look at what's in front of us. And remember that you do have agency over the decisions that you make on a day-to-day basis. Depending on the level of privilege you have, of course.

So speaking of feelings, strong feelings, I would like to state for you, especially if you are a deep feeler or you're just kind of in your feelings right now, that your ability to have strong feelings is a gift.

There are a lot of people in this world who have shut themselves off from feeling things and addressing their emotions.

And they're purposely staying away from it and not dealing with it. I think that it can be considered a rare superpower as a business owner, if you are a very emotional person and you have a lot of empathy, empathy for your own mission, your own business and the experiences that your ideal clients are going through.

And I know that in a previous episode, I had just told you about smart goals and I don't know about you, but I'm kind of up to my neck with smart goals and people telling me what I should be focusing on.

Even though there's a good reason to have, you know, that, that methodology.

But today, I'd like to offer you some alternative goal setting methods. Especially if you are a feeler, an empath, an intuitive person an introvert, a highly sensitive person. All of the above.

First of all, the problem with smart goals. And I promise I'll stop talking about this, but I guess it's just really on my mind right now. The problem with smart goals is that I think that if you're not extremely careful about how you set them for yourself and your own expectations is that if there's too much emphasis on focusing on like an achievement and attaining a certain goal, then that could possibly, whether you're really good at smart goals, or you really suck at them, it's just like failure over and over and over.

It might lead you into have a habit of defining your own personal success with production or output or some kind of achievement. And honestly, I mean, you can hear it, right. That's a fast way to unintentionally feed the capitalist engine of our corporate centered culture and also burn yourself out in the process.

So we don't want to do that.

So instead, maybe you want to try considering one of these options.

The first option is to track the amount of time that you spend doing certain tasks. Now I'm talking about you timing yourself in terms of your business.

I know that you're doing a lot of work and you're probably also doing it while you're on the go. You have your phone in your hand, and sometimes it's not entirely possible. Although I am always a proponent of like, try to do as little business on your phone as possible. Just to break the habit of basically being addicted to this little like glowing box of pixels that we all carry around.

But I'll give you an example of tracking time that you spend doing your tasks.

So you might take the goal of reach 1 million subscribers on YouTube by 2025. Which is a S.M.A.R.T. goal, right? That's an attainable measurable timely, yada yada.

But instead of that, And I think this is a really good way to break it down for yourself instead of overwhelming yourself and possibly setting yourself up for failure or overwhelm. Is to say that your goal is to spend three hours per week pitching podcasts, guest opportunities. Especially since YouTube is trying to set itself up as a podcast platform somehow.

But just keeping in mind the difference between those two goals.

If you want to reach a certain amount of subscribers on YouTube versus actually pitching to be a guest on other shows. Then the more podcasts that you're on the more that you'll reach out to people who will potentially I look you up and then subscribe to your channel.

It's almost as if the new goal is actually the main thing. And then your previous school, that's more of a smart goal and achievement based is more of a side effect of the new strategy that you're using.

Of course to get those subscribers, then you have to actually be on the shows, right. To be on the show is you have to pitch yourself.

So try timing yourself instead. Use a time tracker. And, uh, you can run reports and check your progress and when you look back on your goal setting, because of course that's a big part of the goal-setting process is that you have to actually take the time to acknowledge whether you did it or not.

But you can go back and if you timed yourself, then, you know, how many shows you actually pitched. You know how many you got onto. You go, you know, how many were published, uh, you know, in the time span that you might have used for simply blindly wanting to get more subscribers, make sense?

Okay. My second alternative to S.M.A.R.T. Goals, especially if you're kind of in your feelings right now is to track your current and desired feeling on a scale of one to 10.

And this is wildly different from the achievement based smart goal setting system that we're all used to. But the idea is to basically say, let's say your goal now is to fill up a full passport over two years.

Now I know that that's like a big goal, especially with the pandemic and costs and you know, all kinds of limitations that you might be facing. But maybe you like travel because you love the experience of new cultures. Or architecture or food or traveling just makes you feel inspired.

And so, you know, the afterward you feel a whole lot better at whatever you're doing and whatever you're kind of escaping from. So let's say that at this point before you've traveled, you're at a level four. And you're setting this goal, hoping that it'll get you to a level 10 of feeling really inspired.

So, if you want to track your current and desired feeling, on a scale of one to 10, then, what you would do is set a reminder on your phone, on your calendar to reassess this feeling of being inspired in about six months.

And in the meantime, what you can do is you can practice creating that feeling now. Without the, uh, international travel and potentially putting yourself in danger and maybe participating in a little bit of escapism.

You can actually practice that feeling of being inspired or whatever it is that travel makes you feel. And you can start planning like a day trip excursion to somewhere local to you that you've never been to.

Or, I don't know, you could do something like you go around and take pictures of yourself, hugging your favorite buildings in your hometown.

Or if you're you have a partner, then you can go out on your date night. Uh, go somewhere you've never eaten before with a type of cuisine you've never had before and see how that makes you feel.

The idea is that from now until six months from now, when you reassess. If an international trip happens, then that's great.

Like, if you want to keep planning your trips, then go on them, you know?

But you can still have that feeling now, instead of putting it off until later. And honestly, maybe international trips is like a big step.

And maybe that's not on your radar, but you could use this same idea with like going to the spa. If you feel really relaxed and at ease and calm and peaceful.

Then you can figure out ways to create that for yourself now, instead of saying, oh, I'm not allowed to feel good having achieved anything for myself, unless I've gone to the day spa. Makes sense?

And finally my alternative way for you to set some goals for yourself is to track your actions. For example, the number of times that you reach out.

And this sounds a little bit similar to the first one, but I'll give you an example.

Instead of, and I see this all the time in masterminds that I've been part of. When we set smart goals, it sounds like your goal is to sell five of your highest level packages so that you hit that 10 K per month milestone.

And that is a completely valid way of setting goals. And that totally works for some people.

But if it hasn't worked for you or if something about that just doesn't feel right, or maybe it doesn't even feel attainable, even though that's how you know that you're supposed to be thinking.

Then you can change it to the number of actions that you take that you think will actually get you to that goal.

For example, you can aim to, to DM 50 people who are already close to you. Close friends or close supporters. And you can see if they're interested in working with you.

Like, you're not trying to hard sell them and you're not trying to like, schemey - slimy your way into their personal lives or anything, even though I know that that's a method that a lot of MLMs say to use.

But like, these are actual people who are supporters and already fans of your work and you know who they are, right?

And if you don't have 50 of them, then you'll eventually find some.

But pick a number and choose to DM them and have conversations. And ask them if they are interested, ask them if they've even seen the offer that you put out there.

Your achievement isn't based on them buying it and them paying you because you don't have control over that, right? You only have control over the things that you do. And so setting a goal based on what other people do with you isn't completely reasonable.

But once you hit that 50th DM that you send out. You know, whenever that is. Then that's when you celebrate. Because your goal has been achieved.

Again, I will emphasize that your ability to have strong feelings and to be really locked into your emotions and how you feel about the way certain businesses are run, especially the business that you have... it's a gift. It really is.

And we need more of the kind of work that you're doing in this world of entrepreneurship.

We need more feeling people, more empaths. More sensitive people to balance out all of the hustle and the grind and the nose to the grindstone, sleep when you're dead type of culture that we have right now.

So consider it your superpower and take some of these alternative goal-setting practices and apply them to your own business.

All right, friends. That's all for today. I hope you found that informative. And if you are looking to connect, if you kind of like the vibe that you're getting here on this podcast, then please find me on LinkedIn. You can send me a connection request.

Let me know the title of the episode that you just listened to and, uh, say hello. Maybe we can collab together on something. All right, I'll see you around. Bye-bye.

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